By James W. Wade III
January 6, 2023
It's been a long while since I wrote my blog; starting in 2023, I have to make more time to sit still and craft my blog. As human beings, we have specific characteristics ingrained in us by default; some are jealous, some are spoiled, etc. They do not last forever but do not vanish by themselves either. It takes conscious effort to reduce its effects on our thoughts and actions. If you pay attention, you will see those issues rise to the top and, as my mother used to say, rear their ugly head.
The main ones who don't do anything are the main ones who complain, and it's easy to find fault in everybody else because they are the ones doing a lot, and I guarantee the ones talking behind your back are the ones doing nothing. Some are jealous of the skills you have or what you can do. I wish I could do many things, but I never hate the people doing them; I applaud them for being able to do the things I can't. We all can learn from someone, don't care what you have done in the world; someone else has done much more and accomplished it better than you.
When you are doing well, and many see it, the haters and everyone else start talking. Do you have a friend? If they are doing well and you compliment them, that's all good, but they can't open their mouth if you do something good. Have you those people who judge their status by who they know? They feel important if they know everyone, and if they don't, they feel threatened. Is that what life is all about? not in my world; I want to be me; I am ok with the skin I am in.
I get a kick out of this one; their ego needs constant appreciation and stroking. They are driven by titles while trying to make themselves feel better when they do not receive such positive reinforcement from external sources. People's brain attempts to boost their self-esteem whenever there is an opportunity. In their minds, they try to use power to make themselves feel important. Finding a flaw in someone makes them feel superior. But when you present an idea, they don't accept it. Then say the same idea to someone else and make it seem like it was their idea.
You will have one or more people you dislike in your workplace, any environment, or even your friends circle. I am sure you have many reasons to justify your hatred too. But there also exists another person who feels the same about you. It could very well be the same person you despise. But if I ask why the other person hates you, you would have an explanation again. You believe he doesn't like your way of life and his anger is illogical. If you think with an open mind, you will notice the bias in your thought process. You consider your dislike towards another person logical, but the complaints against you are stupid. In both cases, you pin the blame on the other person. I could drop the mic on this one; as grown people, we should not be so quick to point out every minor failure because you accept all your failures, your list who probably be longer than theirs if you be honest with yourself.
Being a person dealing with sickness, I see life as being too short for the dumb mess; regardless of our reluctance to confront tough issues or challenge people, we need to. We can only advance, succeed, or grow with confrontation. Engaging in productive conflict paves the way for a diversity of thought, developing healthy boundaries, arriving at new, innovative approaches, better decision-making, and challenging the status quo, all of which are essential if we want to thrive in our lives and work.
So in 2023, why not practice not being so petty and call and talk to the person you have the issue with instead of calling all around the city and telling other people? Confront the person you have a problem with and make sure you see and accept all the things you are not doing; using your title and power does not make any situation right.